Psalm 103

Psalm 103

Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits - who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.

He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel: The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust. As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more. But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children - with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.

The Lord has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.

Praise the Lord, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word. Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts, you his servants who do his will. Praise the Lord, all his works everywhere in his dominion.

Praise the Lord, O my soul.

God is good. All the time.

So... I realize that I am a flake and I barely ever write in here...

Good News: I'm going to Thailand!

Bad News: I get to sit around and anxiously think about it for the next seven months because I don't leave until the end of December.

I am feeling very random today and totally unmotivated. But my overall feeling is that God is good to me, all the time.

I recently found this verse:
"May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it."
1 Thessalonians 5:23-24

Patience is a virtue and I don't have it!

I sent in my application to join the ministry at The Centre in Thailand on May 5th and my contact over there said that they would pray over my application and get back to me within two weeks. I have spent the last 11 days anxiously awaiting an email. I have not been sleeping well because my mind is spinning so fast that I can't relax. I have been biting my nails which is completely abnormal for me. I have been distracted and just overall impatient. This past weekend was rough because I don't have access to email outside of the office and I had no idea if they had emailed or not. Today I came into the office and there was no email which left me feeling bummed and even more anxious then before. Around lunch time I looked at my cell phone and realized that my ringer was off. I had two voicemails from my contact at The Centre. Surely they would only call all the way from Thailand if they want me to come join them, right? I can't call them back but she said that she would try again tomorrow. So, now I am waiting again but it is even harder now because I am terrified that she is going to ask me to join them in Thailand. Can you imagine picking up your life and moving to Thailand? I am excited as well. Maybe I should go home right now and go to bed so that tomorrow will come faster. My stomach hurts...

Thailand

Sorry that I have not written in awhile, I have not been able to get onto my blog page for over a week. But it looks like it is working now, so I am back!

I have been talking to a woman by the name of Clair who along with her husband runs a ministry in Thailand called The Centre. They minister to college students through English classes, bible studies and by building relationships. The Centre is really just a fun place for Thai students to hang out and feel loved. Clair and I have been talking about me joining them for a year or two and helping with the ministry. I have been praying about it a lot and have decided to go ahead and start the application process. If everything works out (support raising, getting the necessary paperwork to live in Thailand, etc.), I will probably go over there at the end of the year. Clair has stated that they would like to have me as soon as I am able to come.

Right now I am feeling overwhelmed at the thought that I could be living on the other side of the world by the end of the year. But I am also really excited and a bit scared. I hate the thought of leaving my family but as hard as I try, I can't ignore the call of God. I was telling a friend the other day that sometimes I wish God would just call me to a normal life where I could stay close to family, have a regular job, get married and have a family and just be content. But for some reason that I cannot fathom, He has called me to follow Him across the world and leave all that normal stuff behind. He has made me a person that so far has never been content with my life because I know that there are people out there that need to be told His story and I can do that. Maybe some day I will settle down in a normal life but right now I am going to follow His call to Thailand.

Please keep me in your prayers as I am in the application process and will soon be raising money and getting ready to go. Thanks so much for your support! I'm excited!!!

New Roof

It has been awhile since I last wrote... I was unexpectedly out of the office last Thursday and Friday because I got a new roof on my house. My landlord called at the last minute and said that the roofers would be at my house at 7am Thursday morning. I got up and got ready for work before realizing that there was no way I could leave my dogs in the house all day by themselves. I thought that they were both going to have heart attacks because of all the banging, scraping and yelling coming from our roof. One of the dogs actually threw up in the kitchen because she was so scared. By the end of Thursday, our old roof was gone and in it's place was a hole in my ceiling. I could stand in my living room, look up and see the sky. I ended up staying home Friday as well so that I could let the roofers in to fix the ceiling. It was an eventful couple days. I was exhausted by the end of Friday and I was not even working. I had Saturday and Sunday off work as well so I had an unexpected 4 day weekend. What a blessing!

So long, farewell, it's time to say goodbye...

My friend Andy just made the rounds here in the office and said goodbye to everyone. He tortured me and said that he would come back to my office last, so I had to watch him say goodbye to everyone else. By the time he got back to my office I was already an emotional wreck and the tears came easily.

When I first started working for Amor I was terrified of Andy, there was just something about him that did not seem very approachable. Then a couple years ago I moved into a house about a mile from his house and we started carpooling to work. I discovered that Andy is a pretty fantastic guy and not at all terrifying. We started hanging out and he soon became a very good friend. We spent an hour in the car together every day and Andy became the person that I talked to about everything going on in my life. He'd listen, offer advice when I needed it and be brutally honest even when I didn't want him to be. Andy had the ability to make me laugh more than the average person and the ability to make me so angry that I could not verbally respond to him.

I am going to miss our carpooling, visits to Arby's and the BBQ House, going to the movies, watching CSI, Law and Order and Without a Trace. I will miss the two of us singing along as loud as we could to country songs on the radio, the fact that he could tell me the name and artist of any song that came on the radio and how he always said that he was born in the wrong decade because he absolutely loves oldies music. But the thing that I will miss the most is hearing Andy's rendition of the National Anthem every morning on our way to work, I think maybe he was getting better.

Andy leaves tomorrow to start his training with the FBI and then will probably be stationed far away from San Diego. I know he will do well and I wish him the best.

Goodbyes are always hard. In a weird way they are almost like death because there is a mourning period that occurs when someone moves away.

If you can, say a prayer for Andy.

Esther

My friend Esther wants me to blog about her so here it is.

Yesterday she asked me what the 10/40 window was. I was a little shocked that she asked because Esther's parents have been missionaries her whole life and now as an adult she works for a missions organization. But one of her common quotes is "I just came to earth a couple years ago." Anyway, I told her what the 10/40 window is and now she feels a little bit smarter.

Esther, you're great! Have fun in New York and be safe!